All Up In The 'Swirl'

Several girlfriends of mine got together the other week and had a girls night out. And during this event, two of them were simply glowing from ear-to-ear. Giggling and ish like little school girls. So I asked them why they were so giddy and they both yelled out, "swirl". Now, of course I haven't always been the quickest person during these moments, especially since I wasn't familiar with the term and my other girlfriend rolled her eyes and said to me, "they've given up and went to the other side." Thinking she meant becoming lesbians, my eyes widened. But then we had an in depth conversation about the swirl and what it meant.

Definition: an interracial relationship most notably between a Black woman and White man. Also known in social circles as "Something New", which was a phrase coined after a move starring Sanaa Lathan in which she becomes involved with the man.

Both of my girlfriends had found "swirl" love and they were smiling big time. Now I personally don't get all the swirl love and jungle fever and something new talk. I for one, believe that you fall in love with whom you wish, be it any color. I have never been one to dog interracial dating and I have even dated outside my race a few times. Nothing wrong with it. However, when people purposefully seek to find those outside of their race and exclude their own race in the dating pool is when I get my thongs in a bunch. This type of attitude will get no love from me.

So back to my girlfriends. One of them said she met "Aaron" while working at her job which is in retail. Aaron was White, but had what she called dark and exotic features. After a little bit of harmless flirting back and forth, they decided to go out and a date and now she is in heavy like mode. After years of dating "no-good" black men (her words, not mine folks), she said that she has finally found someone who is employed, makes good money, doesn't live at home with their mother, and doesn't wear his pants sagging down his ass. Of course these are all stereotypes that she is perpetuating but again, I am writing about this in terms of the conversation.

My other friend simply stated that "Clark" was her soulmate. They met online and she never thought she would end up daitng a White guy, but after they met and kicked it a few times, the attraction began. She said she still has trouble digesting the whole affair and their differences (he doesn't add any spice to his food when he cooks, things of that nature) but they are talking about it and communicating. IMO, she is more natural with her "swirl". And she didn't say she was swearing off the "no-good Black men", but that she had found someone who was appealing to her and she would see what would happen.

"Men have been doing it for years," my first girlfriend said. The one who seems to have a lot of hatred towards Black men. "Dating all these Becky's and stuff and leaving us behind. So I only think it's fair that we do it too."

Sister-girl was so bitter, it was kinda sad. She was now swearing off a whole group, an entire segment of the population because she felt that they had done her dirty. And that may have been so. But just like every Black woman isn't on welfare, has seven kids, likes to get loud and fight, etc. etc. is not true. When we start grouping ALL people into one category and judging them by behavior that applies to some and not all (and some meaning ALL people, not just one race) then we are doing ourselves and our world a disservice. How can my friend be mad at O.J. (just the first person that popped into my head) for continuously dating a WW after breaking up with a BW when she is doing the same thing? What type of logic is that? 

Speak on it.