Question:
Can men and women be friends. Platonic. No sex?
Answer:
Yes. I have several male friends with whom I am strictly friends with and we haven't gone into that forbidden territory. Of course, some will say that men and women can be friends but there is always that "want" for one or the other or both to eventually have sex. There is always that attraction. And I do agree with that to a certain extent. But I do have friends who are male that I do not feel attracted to whatsoever and they aren't attracted to me (or so they say). So let's say the jury is still out on that one.
But let's get back to the topic at hand. I have a friend who is male and the two of us have been friends for a few years. Now this is a little different because I do believe we have been attracted to each other even before I divorced (more on my divorce later). Anyway, he and I have been kicking it ALOT I would say over the past several months and it we kissed for the first time in over two years last month. It could have went farther but I think we both knew that if it did, we would be at the point of no return and neither one of us are prepared for that.
Shit. He is so cool. And we have a lot in common. We both adore music and the way to my heart, or at least the map, always involves music. And with the new year upon us, I don't want to count him out because we are such good friends. But I also don't want to ruin the wonderful friendship we have built. He is very important to me and I don't think trying to make something between us would be worth potentially damaging our friendship.
This sucks.
Tonight we spoke for a half hour or so and neither of us were confident or comfortable enough with bringing up our pending "relationship"exploring it further. But I must admit, the thought of possibly being his woman, walking beside him, holding his hand, having his back, cooking his dinner and rubbing him down at night is quite appealing. I think about it often. Although, hell, neither one of us are ready for that. He just got out of relationship a few months prior and I just divorced last October. So we are still healing from the past.
I don't wanna hold onto falsehoods. But I don't want to let go either.
I get wet when I see him. When we kissed and our bodies connected and he held me in his arms, I was ready to burst. When I am around him, I feel tingly and warm and fuzzy all at the same time. I can't front.
What's a girl to do?
Add: dannigyrl_is_fab@yahoo.com
3 comments:
I think as females we often over-analyze and it's a double-edged sword. The fact that you have history can be good/bad, and I mean it sounds like the feelings are mutual. So I would ask, at what point would you deem yourself ready or the situation right?..
I want to say why hold back, wonder what if, just communicate be open, and don't keep yourself from experiencing something good even if it may potentially not be "the one" or forever...the estrogen in me however says don't necessarily do all that lol..so I say continue to be self-aware and go with the flow.
Of did I know JIllz was gonna get to this b4 me? :P @ Mz.J
But I have to agree with Jillz that over analyzing could hurt the situation.Meaning that the best you can do is continue open honest communication and see what happens. I feel a true friendship can survive must things including attempted "serious relationships & sex" so just stay true to ya self and things tend to work out in the end.
Interesting...you should do what comes natural if the feeling is true, that's what I say. Sometimes we only get 1 chance, and in the midst of getting a second chance...why wait, why hold back. Knowing the caliber of woman you are, its not like you don't know your needs, or your wants for that matter. God speed ~D2~
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